Buy eit! Thee Mothmann commandz yoo.

Speeking ov Chriztmos...

Speeking ov Chriztmos... wher iz mei hous?

Oh, nevrmind. Eit iz burned too thee grouund, that iz wher. Mei bad. Woz eit Johnny? Ei do not think so, he woz too busie dreszing op dollz and haveing cybursexingz with thee Synaps too notic. Synaps, thank yoo for takeing thee Johnny's virginitie, meybe hei wil stoop bugging mei now.

Soo for seriouz, who ov you did thiz thing?


Oh, nevrmind.

Thee Mothmann Chriztmos Albuum

(Full size Album cover here.)

Rolling Stone

Charlie Rose Show

You're not exactly a new comer, but all of a sudden things seemed to happen for you. Why do you think it happened now? 10 years is quite a while....

Thee eschaton had too be immanized before thee Mothmann cold conquer thee world with hiz novox flairz and hiz savoir fairez. Before, thee world woz not readie. Imaginz thee world if Mothmann arrived befor depenz eufiber undergarmentz. Wher wold all thee pee go when thee Mothmann releasez thee new singles Qliphothic Viscera and Behe-Moth? Eit wold be unsanitarie.

Religious groups have tried to discourage you.

Ei kno wot ei am doing. Theez criticz... Churchez ov thee Angel Michael or somethingz. Eif discouragezmentz mean mor attention too and salez ov mei alboms then ei sai mor pleaz! Thee bible saiz too lov mei neighbor. As eit turnz out they just bought thee houz next too mein so thei can continue protesting me every dai. So thei most lov mei verie moch, yez?

You seem to know what you're doing. Late night with David Letterman, touring with Narcosis, and the upcoming Psychopomp memorial concert...

Eit kickz so moch asz. Ei keep thinking that ther will bei no moor asz too kick, bot ass iz never a thing too bei underestimatedz.

Speaking of, well... is it true that you and Narcosis are an item now?

Eif by item you mean that wei ar fucking, then yez.

And how did it happen? Everyone talks about it but no one knows any details....

Eit woz verie romantic. Wei were working on ei song togethr for thee Psychopomp sho and she woz like, "Iz eit too wot thei sai abot thee siez of ei man's adamantium wingz?" And so ei dropped mei pantz too sho her, and now ei hav a girlfriend! Ei am soo happie now.

Care to comment on your run in with Count Orzaiz and Allejandra at the Amp Room last month?

Ei hat him! Hat him! Thee Count Orzaiz iz not deservingz ov thee sweet passionate lov that thee lovelie Allejandra woz giving thee Mothmann. Fok him and thee Teragenz for making her not lov mei anymor. Exceptz for thee Narcosiz, ov cours. Do not tell her ei woz saying theez thingz abot her friendz, this iz off thee record rite?

Yes.

Oh good.

It sounds like you're still a little hung up on Allejandra to me...

That iz historie. Ei do not lov her anymor. Ei do not crie myself too slep everie nite thinking ov her, nor do ei secretlie imagin her when ei am giving Narcosiz thee sexingz. And ei never fly by her housez or mail little thingz to her or trie to make op with her fat mother. Ei do not wonder everie dai eif she wil get over thiz stupid thing and call mei and mak me feel better and com back too mei and mak thingz back too thee way thei wer.

At least you're not heart broken.

Ei hav no tiem for cryingz, too moch rockingz too be don.

There are a lot of rumors flying around. Everyone seems to know something about your habits. Some say that you have a secret stash in your home containing dozens of stolen and illegally obtained masterpieces. Is this true?

Chaz! Thiz person woz not approved to be asking thiz question! Chaz!

Lets change the topic. Tess Turbo. What's it like working with her?

Wen she iz sober? Terribol. Bot get her thee slightezt bit liquored op and eit iz thee biggezt baddezt partie ever too rock thee fac ov thee earth sinz thee Leuplurodon was become extinctz a hondred yearz ago. Thee Leuplurodon woz mor bad asz than Tess Turbo. Nothing elsz ei can think ov.

How long do you think it will take for you to conquer Japan, and how long do you think you'll stay in the music business?

Ei hav not conquored Japan yet? Wot thee fuck! Chaz! We ar going too Japan right now! RIGHT NOW! *abruptly leaves the studio*

Baby Larvae

Behei-moth

Do not trie too escap,

Eit iz coming for you!

Thiz thing that smashez,

Thee thingz that ei do.

Eit iz Choronzon's sight,

And Bartazel's might,

Inzanitiez,

Profanitiez,

Faux Kristianitiez,

Tearing the lov

And the quantom affectionz

From mei bones.

Rizing!

Rizing!

Behei-moth.

BEHEI-MOTH!

Eit rizes inzide ov mei bones!!!

Behei-moth.
BEHEI-MOTH!
BEHEIIIIII-MOOOOOOTH...!

..

Wot Iz Thee Pulverizer!

Wot Iz Thee Pulverizer!

Wot Iz Thee Pulverizer!

Wot Iz Thee Pulverizer!

Wot Iz Thee Pulverizer!

Live from Nigeria!

Rock Me Anateus

Ooo rok meii Anateus
Rok mei Anateus...
Rok rok rok rok mei Anateus
rok mei all thee timei too thee top

Er war ein Punker
Und er lebte in der großen Stadt
Es war Wien, war Vienna
Wo er alles tat
Er hatte Schulden denn er trank
Doch ihn liebten alle Frauen
Und jede rief:
Coum on and rok mei Anateus

Anateus Anateus, Anateus
Anateus Anateus, Anateus
Anateus Anateus, oh oh oh Anateus

Er war Superstar
Er war populär
Er war so exaltiert
Because er hatte Flair
Er war ein Virtuose
War ein rokidol
Und alles rief:
Coum on and rok mei Anateus

Anateus Anateus, Anateus
Anateus Anateus, Anateus
Anateus Anateus, oh oh oh Anateus

Coum on and rok mei Anateus
Anateus Anateus, Anateus
Anateus Anateus, Anateus
Anateus Anateus, oh oh oh Anateus

Es war um 1780
Und es war in Wien
No plastik monies anymore
Die Banken gegen ihn
Woher die Schulden kamein
War wohl jedermann bekannt
Er war ein Mann der Frauen
Frauen liebten seinen Punk

Anateus Anateus, Anateus
Anateus Anateus, Anateus
Anateus Anateus, oh oh oh Anateus

Coum and rok mei Anateus...

Baby baby do eit too mei rok mei
Baby baby do eit too mei rok mei
Baby baby do eit too mei rok mei
Ja ja ja
Baby baby do eit too mei rok mei
Baby baby do eit too mei rok mei
Baby baby do eit too mei rok mei

Anateus Anateus, Anateus
Anateus Anateus, Anateus

Anateus Anateus, oh oh oh Anateus...

Alejandra!

Alejandra, ei kant go on without you.
Com back too thee Mothmann.

Ei will stop with thee drugz.
Ei will be niec to yor stupid fat mom.
Thee thingz will be different.
Ei promiz!

MTV Interviews Mothman!

First of all, thank you Mothman for allowing us to speak with you today.

Eit iz mei pleazur. Get on with thee queztionz.



Thank you. Let me begin by asking, was it you, or your agent, who decided to go with the whole Mothman theme?

Look at mei Terry, Ei am a fockyng monster. If thee fanz wonted thee prettie faes and thee savoir faire they wold listen too Prince or N!Sync or something. Eit iz cliche too sai thiz bot Ei am wot Ei am. Step too the motha-fockyn adamantiom wingz bitchez. Respec.



I see. So, you came up with it on your own then?

No, it woz all thee idea ov mei agent Chaz. Ei wonted too sing Britney Spearz couverz and thee broadwai showtunz bot Chaz woldn't hear ov eit. The kidz wont too rook soo hard thei pee themselvz, he saiz. Rock soo hard thee blood ein ther pee makz them die ov blood loss. Qliphothic Viscera, babie. Thee man iz a genios.



Have you ever killed a man with your music?

No. Wot thee fock queztion iz that?



Have you tried?

Ei once tried. Eit iz moch harder than eit lookz, and now ei have a moch greatr appreciation for the Linkin Park. Thei mak me wont too kill meiselv bot Chaz wold not let mee.



Did you go through any other names before you landed on Mothman?

Mei band, lik most bands, woz initiallie rezentfol when ei made it big and negotiated a moch higher salarie than them. When wee started off we wer Mothman and thee Mighty Moth-ticlez bot that did not sell az well. Thee label wold not heer ov it. So we are simplie Mothman now. Word to thee Mothticlez, respec.



How evil would you say you are?

Ei am somewher between Hitler and Chaka Khan.



So, how would you compare your evil to, say, Garth Brooks?

Ther iz no comparing Mothman to thee evil that iz Garth Brooks. Thee man haz mor evil in hiz big gay hed than er have in all ov me. Mad respec to thee Garth Brooks. Ei am not worthie.



Wow.

Yez, ei am stil evil enouf. Ther iz room in thiz world for Mothman and thee great Garth Brooks, mai hee rezt in piecz.



Let's talk about your music. Where do you get your inspiration?

Satan.




What is your favorite band of all time?

Mine.



Favorite song?

"I'm too sexy" by Right Said Fred.



And your favorite album...














No contest. With a cloz second being that albom with thee "I'm too sexy" song, wotever it waz.



On a personal level, how is your family?

Eit haz nevar been beter. Allesandra and ei have mad up and are now back to thee hot lovemakingz that onlie she and ei can be making. Thee catholic girlz lov thee devil, do you kno wot ei am sayingz? Ei will probablie get in troble with her for thiz so do not repeat okay?



In light of the fact that you have your own children now, how do you feel about accusations
that your music is a negative influence on youth?

Ei do? Sinz when? Novaz can't hav children, didn't you know? That caze woz thrown out ov court yearz ago. Plez do not go there. Chaz! Wot is thiz man asking about thiz thing for? Wot thee fock!



I guess I'll should be going. Thank you for your time, Mothman.

No problem Terry reprahzent and plez don't poblish thee part about Allesandra she wil kill me. Peaz, lov, respec. The Mothman iz out.

Whoz larvae iz theez?

Manie ov U think that Johnie iz mei nomber one fan, bot that iz not tru. Johnie iz a littl bitch and lackz imaginaton. Barbara, plez stop sending me theez stuped babie picturz. U ar scaring yor kid and making thee Mothman crie. Jost stop, plez? Ei will pai U whatevr yu wont. Jost stop.

Bucketz

Qliphothic Viscera, thee Cologne

Buy the Mothman's latest fragrance for only $89 at specialty stores.
Supplies are limited, so get yours today!

Qliphothic Viscera

Qliphothic Viscera

Viszerotiq excreminationz ov quantom lovemakingz
Terrotixiq manivestazionz ov thee cobalt animuz

Qliphothic Viscera!
Qliphothic Viscera!
Qliphothic Viscera!
Qliphothic Viscera!

Neurotiq thrashingz ov eschatizationz

Thru death's claw thee cobalt lobe awakenz

Qliphothic Viscera!

Qliphothic Viscera!

Qliphothic Viscera!

Qliphothic Viscera!

Crie havok give chase to thee quantom dimensionz

Thee eye of kaoz, samzadhi, apoptik creationz

Qliphothic Viscera!
Qliphothic Viscera!
Qliphothic Viscera!
Qliphothic Viscera!

Equilibriationz ov thee quantom firez

Immanize

Billboard #1 Hit Single

1. Montauk Rouge

2. Montauk Rouge (Fatboy Slim Remix)

3. Montauk Rouge (Radio Edit)

4. Ovulate

5. Linkin Park Sucks

6. Qlipphotic Vizcerra

7. Montauk Rouge (Voodoovox Remix)

8. Master Of Puppets (Terrorvox Deicide remix)

(art from http://frazettaartgallery.com/gallery/prints/118_mothman.jpeg)

Make a Wish Foundation

A wish kid’s dream to be in a music video with terrorvox legend Mothman was realized earlier this week at the nova's private recording studio in Point Pleasant, West Virginia. "I'm covered in blood!" gushed fifteen year old Alex Cordova as he hung out with band members and staff on the set of Mothman's newest music video Qlipphotic Vizcerra. Mothman's famous foot wide red saucer eyes have terrorized millions of fans, but today he couldn't help shedding a tear for Alex, who's going into surgery for a brain tumor next week.

Alex spent the rest of the day having dinner at Mothman's vintage Charleston mansion recently featured in Yo N!Cribs. "Alex iz tapped into zee MR-gnoseez and iz one bad M#$^%. Respect." After dinner Mothman personally excorted Alex and his father to a waiting limo filled with a lifetime supply of Mothman merchandise.

Fan Mail

Dear Mothman,

Hi! I'm from Seattle and I'm a big fan of yours. I just wanted to make a comment of how people are so rude and harsh. I was reading one comment about how a girl thought that Mothman was weird for having freakishly huge adamantium wings and huge glowing red eyes. Oh, and for being a twelve foot tall hulking engine of terrorvox death.

How rude! I'm only 17 but I've been through enough to know that if at the end of the day if you're happy with yourself than that's all that matters. So be yourself, and don't worry about what other people think. Your real fans love you.

Keep immanentizing my eschaton, baby!



Christina
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO <<<3

Linkin Park?

Ov Quantom Sheepz

The website opens to a video post, in which millions of screaming fans are screaming for an encoure. Lighters lit, the crowd cries out for their hero...

Mothman

Mothman

Mothman!

The curtain rises, and the crowd explodes! Mothman walks to the center of the stage and lets loose the lyrics to his newest hit single, Montauk Rouge.

"My lobe awakened,

Dreeming dreems of quantom sheap,

On void terror wings,

Rings

Voodoo vox artiste,

Rapping hard now and forever,

Gonna change thee world... Fly!

My millions ov screaming fans. Fly."

(OOC: Hat tip to http://www.mothmanlives.com/ for the character portrait.)